Fear Verses Freeedom

The other day I got an email from the founder of the Diva’s shooting group.  It was a mass email about a slasher in our area.  This guy is going around to different stores and slashing people, woman, in the back side.

This email generated a lot of discussion about all kinds of self defense and gun related topics, but in my house my daughter challenged me with something I hadn’t thought about nor had I seen anyone discuss it.

It is nearly back to school time which means back to school shopping.  My daughter and I love to go shopping together.  I don’t care so much for the shopping, but it is a fun way to spend time with her and get her the things she needs.  I think she likes the time with me too, but she all likes the goods.

Anyway, she asked if she could buy some things online and I said, “What, no, it’s more fun to take a girls day and go to the stores.”

She said the store I want to go to isn’t around here. 

I reminded her that there was such a store just a few minutes a way and she said…

“I am not going there.  That is where the slasher is.”

I got kind of a quizical look on my face and told her we were not going to let this guy control our life and we are not going live in fear.

Ever the thinker, she asked me, “I thought you said if you know there is gonna be trouble, to avoid, avoid, avoid????”

Yea, I did say that…

So where is the line between avoiding trouble and letting the bad guy control you?

When am I teaching her not to be afraid and to stand up for herself and when am I crossing a line by possibly putting her in danger?

I think for me, the line between where I will go and where I won’t go comes down to my fear verses my freedom.

I will not walk into a situation I know to be dangerous and I will leave or avoid a place or person I believe to be unsafe or harmful, but I won’t live in fear nor will I let the idea or the mere possibility of danger keep me from doing something I would normally do.

I am not going to get into a plane with a pilot I know to be drunk because that is asking for trouble, but I will get onto a plane and take the chance that the pilot may be drunk and I don’t know it or he may be overly tired or the plane may have a malfunction. 

I will take the risk because I know the stats of plane crashes and I believe the risk is in my favor.  I can not completely illuminate the danger, but I am not going to let that possibility keep me from doing the things I want to do, like flying to China to bring my children home.

If it were just me, I would go to the store and buy the clothes, but I am also aware that my primary job is to keep my daughter safe and since I know there is a possibility of her being harmed, even though I would be carrying my gun, I am not going to take her to the store with the known threat out there.

Bad guys tick me off!!!

3 thoughts on “Fear Verses Freeedom

  1. We (knock on wood) haven’t had any attacks in the of the areas I take the kids (that we know of anyway), but, I am constantly on alert as to what is going on around us. My boys are very friendly and outgoing, which we don’t want to discourage, but at the same time how do you make them aware at such a young age that there are bad guys out there? Especially without scaring them to death??

  2. Bad guys tick me off, as well…but such is the world we live in, unfortunately. I agree with you on not living in fear or choosing not to go somewhere or do something out of fear. However, I have realized I used to go about with an almost defiant attitude (“I’ll go grocery shopping at midnight, if I feel like it!! I can if I want to!!”) (I am a rebel at heart, though I hate to admit it!) Now, I realize I can wisely choose to avoid unnecessary risks, without assessing it as a choice out of fear. As my martial arts instructor says, “Why go out grocery shopping at midnight, when it is dark and more deserted (inviting more crime) when you can go out while it is light out and more populated? It’s just a matter of making a wise choice.” Of course, if that is the only time I can go shopping, I will…but if I have a choice, I will choose the daylight. If there was a slasher around and I NEEDED to go shopping, I would, without fear but with heightened alertness. If it could wait, I’d probably wait or do it online. I’m with you with the kid thing; if I had my child with me, I’d definitely wouldn’t put him/her at “extra” risk by taking them along. Hope they track the bad guy down soon.

  3. Molly B, you are exactly right!! This is what I have learned as well and is what I am hoping to teach my children. Simply make a choice does not mean you are controlled by fear or circumstance.

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